The Pyramind Explained

The Dating Guide Pyramid Explanation should have been the first post under this blog - I apologize for that.


For the most part, men and women view the hierarchy of relationships completely different. (yes, I know there's a book called 'Men are from Mars, Women...will read anything Oprah says is good') I am aware of that. However these psychological observations often render an ideal perspective that is difficult to appreciate, much less execute.

Ideally we seek an understanding and our partner blah blah. We're different. We get it. Enough.

The Dating Guide Pyramid is simple. It's systematic and accurate. You see the chart? Figure out where you can plug yourself in, in the eyes of your partner - then decide if you should bail, or try to climb to the top, or stay where you are. The sooner you understand the mechanisms....the less strain you will go through.

It's a fairly simple method of figuring out relationship hierarchy, priorities and roles in order soberly analyze how people behave. It aims to be fair. but it varies from person to person.
The basic principle is this: The more serious it gets, the less people it can involve, and the different tiers are proportional in value.
here is the break down.

TOP TIER - TWO HEARTS (the relationship)
The one that requires the least explaining (I hope). At the top of the Food Group/Food Chain, however you look at it, you can only have ONE significant other. No excuses. If you want to do something right, you can only give your full attention to one person. Call it devotion. Call it focus. Call it Love. Call it a gameplan. It doesn't matter how you see relationships in general, as long as you understand that in the most ideal situation, you have one hand in yours. If you want to fuck around, well....you will fail, and you already know this. This Tier is the heaviest and it nullifies all the others lower tiers. You shouldn't be with more than one person.

BOTTOM TIER - THE MOUTHS (talking to someone)
I think explaining the top and bottom tiers are the easiest, and the middle tiers get trickier, but the gist of the mouths is to represent the people you talk to, in a quasi-romantic setting. It should be defined by what you do, not how you feel. If you only talk, text, e-mail, IM, Facebook, and see each other ocassionally, that person is on this tier. If they don't have a ringtone for when they call, You're just talking to them. If they see you out and say "call me later" and you forget... you're just talking to them.
That's also the beauty of the tiers - that if you sleep with someone you are talking to...you're no longer talking to them. You're seeing them. At least. For some, they could argue this means you're dating them.

MIDDLE BOTTOM - Eyes (Seeing someone)
Seeing someone requires more effort than talking to someone. This I would define with more physical contact and scheduled meetings - not just bumping into them. You may find yourself seeing someone by something as simple as the line "Want to go to that new movie on Friday?" Where the casualness of encounters is now measurable in a horizon, since plans were made. Again, sex is tricky. Sluts would argue that they sleep with people they talk to. It varies from person to person. But it would be nice to ask the person you're seeing if they're seeing someone else. You shouldn't see more that four people.

MIDDLE TOP - Keys (Dating Someone)
This is also murky territory. This tier is a deal breaker or maker for some because it has vestiges of a relationship but not as constricting as having a mutual cellphone plan. It has an air of spontaneity which makes you believe you're still sorta single-ish and just seeing them because you still proudly boast your liberty through BOYS NIGHT!/GIRLS NIGHT!

Luckily, as previously stated, our actions define our status, not our emotions.
If you have a toothbrush at their house, or they have one at yours...You're Dating. If your mom asks about this person...You're dating. Doesn't matter if you don't hold hands in public. Someone people have sweaty palms- shit. If you're pretty sure this person is going to get you a Christmas present, but you're not sure if you are going to get one for them...You might just be seeing them, so relax.

It's just math.
you can talk to x number of people, see half of them, date half of those, and be with just one.
In other words, Dating someone is worth seeing two people, or talking to 4 people.
You can't date someone and be with someone at the same time. it doesn't fit on the pyramid, see? But you can date someone, and see two people....or talk to 4 people.


Make sense??
Scary but true.